Wednesday, February 1, 2012

SPIDER BREAKS HIS THINGY DURING SEX

Over my coffee this morning, I was faced with a story about spider sex. Biologists have long known that the female spider kills the male spider after sex.

Somehow this always made perfect sense to me but then my sense of humor is a little twisted sometimes.

Now it's been discovered that the male breaks off his thingy inside the female to accomplish several things. It keeps injecting sperm into her assuring paternity and it acts as a "plug" to keep another male from getting to her.

I think this explains why she kills him. You go girl!

I have a can of RAID house and garden spray that would settle that whole dispute. Just please, someone tell me this important study wasn't funded by a government grant….

That brings to mind a story in a local newspaper a couple of years ago.

A woman in her 70s shot and killed her husband. When police arrived, they found her sitting in the bathroom on the toilet. Naturally they asked her why she had shot him.

"He said he wanted to have sex and I knew it was either him or me!" she explained.

Made sense to me, and I still laugh every time I think about it.

If you think about how strange all of this is, just google the sex life of an earthworm. And it was done on a government grant.

I was terribly naive as a kid. When I'd ask a question, I wouldn't get a straight answer. When I asked how babies got in mommy's tummy, the answer from my mother was "Don't worry about it. Someday you'll understand." What kind of an answer was that, for pete's sake! I was 14 years old at the time.

When I was finally told how it happened, I thought she was lying to me. I remember thinking "Even I'm not stupid enough to believe that."

As the old saying goes, "I got too soon old and too late smart."

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